k!k! kaz!m!
To the lover and the beloved
i feel seduced yet the seduction sometimes takes the effect of a blade, it is harsh yet something mystic protects me, i am dancing in the clearing of a forest, the moon light kisses me, i brush my hair but the bristles are made of nails, the grass around my feet intertwines with my toes, my spirals bear the weight of lead, its the essence of candle wax dripping down the candles, the blade that splits the skin, the piece of icing that stays leftover on your mouth, that you get to later lick up
false memories that have been made up and the traces of those feelings that are left behin
As I finally sit on the castle grounds I am reminded of the stacks of skeletons beneath the soil
The last time I sat here was the night before the ashes of our fond echoes were spread
Those hours of darkness were both grotesque yet celestial
common fixtures became piles of bones and bodies… the walls of the room tried to swallow us whole…
the twilight horizon split open and the cosmic rays grazed my cheek, how could one deny the gestures of a supernova?
only they tried to take me with them
and I was reminded of my mystical connection to this land
a land where melancholy and cheer dance hand-in-hand, where saudade spirits linger and float like the fog flirting with the ground.
The sight of mountains overwhelms me
I am reminded of the bijou presence of man
And the vast loneliness I was once used to
The oppressive silence that becomes only unbearable by the time I would have long been asleep in the metropolitan
But that’s not entirely true either
As there I must listen to vile wretched sounds in order to drown out the pollution of the cityscape, and do I ever really sleep when I am everywhere all at once?
And here it is just the animals, who along with me are collapsed by the consumable night sky
Seeds that had been planted the last time I touched this soil
Have fruited into nothingness
Time has made me invisible, yet never truly detached
So now, at last, from the physicalities of Dzogchen
Whom earlier seduced me to the freedom of forgiveness
I can finally ponder from the cliffs and whisper my wishes to the wild western winds